I'M BACK

and I'm bringing more of everything:

*more Purell.
*more sweet video action.
*more Purell.
*more pacing.
*more Skittles.
*more non-Purell hand sanitizer (because you should always have a backup).
*more hip-hop slang.

However, if you were merely hoping for a super-charged repeat of years past, you're out of luck. This sequel--much like Shakespeare's oft-forgotten Hamlet Part II: Where the hell is everybody?--doesn't play like the original.

What exciting new developments can you expect?

*English will be taught.
*a map showing the location of the Bishop's hidden treasure will be discovered.
*every morning before the first bell I'll ingest enough caffeine to kill a small child.

Brace yourselves, friends. The adventure begins this fall.